When Loneliness Lingers
The loneliness called for me again. The pain in the pit of my stomach had followed the path to my heart and nested there as well. Tears rose, flooding my eyes like an overflowing river, and then spilled over my lids like a waterfall. The world seemed gray and blurry.
I stared out the window at the usually tantalizing beauty of the landscape, which usually stirred a deep well of emotion inside me, but it only seemed bleak and dull. I could not find shelter there today. My mind began the ride on the Ferris wheel of investigation. This is all your fault. Surely you must be to blame. How have you come to this secluded place? The pressure was squeezing the air from my lungs, and the little voice that could barely breathe whispered, “Stop. I want to get off now.”
Yet, there I stood, frozen in isolation and regret. I yearned to have a friend's arms around me, a hug, and a friend’s voice in my ear, reassuring me, “It’s okay now. Everything’s going to be okay.” As I looked away from the window, surrounded by all the treasures that I love, trophies of my life’s work, I realized that, when loneliness comes to visit, it steals away all of my joy and all of my pride. There is no refuge here to find.
Loneliness hurts. The hollow hole that fills my center feels like physical and emotional starvation. When we feel forsaken, it is vitally important to remember the importance of acknowledging our feelings and giving full expression to our emotions. We were all born into this wondrous world to be loved and nurtured, and as we grew and our spirits swelled, we learned to do the same for others. After all, we are only human, and as such, we truly need each other.
Loneliness and being alone are not the same. Being alone can be a choice, and it can be a blissful and extraordinary experience when our minds and hearts are in need of nourishing solitude, restoring balance, and anchoring ourselves. Think of the times when our spirits yearn to spend quiet time surrounded by the splendor of nature, observing the captivating force of life flowing all around us. During quiet reflection, we arrive at the self-realization that balance is crucial when we are stuck between loneliness and solitude. This is when we must remind ourselves that positive thoughts feed positive feelings, which fan the flames of positive action, leading to more positivity in our lives.
Although we feel lost at times, we can listen to our heart’s voice and know that the tools we need can be found within, and they will provide the sense of direction we so desperately require. When our hearts feel starved and neglected, we can use this blueprint to return to the source of abundance that fills our being. It is our essence. In taking back our power by reaching out to loved ones who may just be in need of the same reprieve, we can begin to heal our open wounds. All people feel the pain of loneliness from time to time and long for the indescribable feeling and freedom of sharing love and life.
It is in our nature to need love and to give love, but change and manifestation require action. In our need, we can surrender to our vulnerability and allow ourselves to be unapologetically aware that we not only crave and yearn for human connection, but we positively require it to sustain us. Laughter shared between family or friends can rehabilitate the soul, illuminate the heart, and bring the sparkle back to one’s eyes.
In the ever-increasing passage of life, we can give ourselves permission to slow the pace and lay down our endless pursuits to make time for the loving reconnection. We can also reflect on courageous choices, like opening our hearts to faith and trust by stepping outside of our comfort zone to engage with new companions, allowing ourselves to stretch and grow. Like the tiny chipmunk who peeks outside its hole after a long winter’s rest to feel the first breeze of springtime, we can make the daring choice to abandon the protection of our burrows. We are capable of evolving, and we have limitless reserves of strength that will endure, for this too shall pass.
Gratitude is a reminder and invitation to make interdependence a priority as important as any other. We can express gratitude for our one precious life and feel joy in the desire and need to share it. Feeling solid and standing firmly now, with our feet rooted to the ground, we can choose to stare loneliness in the eyes. In the face of our strength, and in our defiance, with our hearts open and receptive, loneliness cannot survive. It dissipates. Loneliness dissolves.
